...

I'm going back to study after so so long, and not only because I had to wait a year to try to get into university again, but because, to be honest, I didn't do a lot all high school

I'm kinda anxious ngl, I was the kind of teenager who wasn't tyring to kill myself actively but for one or other reason I though i wouldn't grow old enough to go to university; and also thanks to some stuff my grades and life in general went to the trash, and I'm still unsure of how one's suposed to put effort and actually study to pass

I'll probably have to talk to people and came out of the closet with them, which I kinda hate too, and Imma move outstate to go irl once online immersion course ends so I'll have to learn how to be selfsuficient and stuff, but my biggest worry is studying, likee I can eat shit for a month while I learn how to cook more than three meals, but I can't afford failing a class...

I've been kinda down lately too, like I'm already tired and I want to sleep a lot and tha when rn clases are easy and online, idk if I'll be able to keep up for whole 4 years, I'm expecting to fail at least twice and I don't know what is the best I could doooo

However I gotta think it's such a privilege to be able to attend classes in the first place I already went over it when i got into High schoo

I guess the point of this blog is to come back to read it later and maybe think "Heey look at what I was thinking when I just started Uni" and say poor dumbass had hope, or aww I thought everything could go worse

So yeah, first time in years trying to get GRADES - at least - and study for once